Rave The X-Mass (1993)

Martin van Zeelandt / TCD
4 minutes ago
3 min read

I was genuinely under the impression that I did review this CD many years ago, but I can't find it on my website. Maybe on a previous iteration of the site, maybe? But that got lost due to some Trojan horse viruses, so we are f**ked. So here's a review which might have been one I already did many years ago, or not. No one knows. Only Santa Claus knows. And he knows everything: if you've been nice, or not nice. He carries that magical book with him, and in it, you can find literally everything. Including the knowledge of me writing this review in the past. Santa, if you are out there, please give me a sign!

He's not given me a sign. So let's pretend it never happened. Well, the CD I've listened to over the last few days, is a special one. Not many of these were made, and it was only a thing during the early 90s. Christmas Hardcore/Gabber CDs. Now that's a statement I thought I'd never make. And it feels weird to say. Christmas and Hardcore music, that doesn't go together, it doesn't blend. Or does it? If we go by the demand from the raving community, there's no such demand at all, and they quietly decided to make it go away.

Rave The City is a well know concept within the Hardcore/Gabber world, and played a huge part in the development of Hardcore. In 1993, they tried to make a CD that could be sold during the festive season, and to see if this would catch on. It didn't, and even though I don't know the sales volume (numbers sold), I can imagine that they weren't high. It was weird, hearing Hardcore songs with Christmas elements, like all the bells and whistles.

It was the early days of Hardcore, and it was trying everything. To no avail. No one was waiting for this, nor was the world ready for it. This sub-genre can be seen as quite niche, and obscure. Over the years there have been this resurgence of people who think this is cool and exciting, and I'm one of those people.

Not sure when I bought this CD, but it must have been after it was released in 1993, and when it was a tad cheaper, as I would not spend any hard earned Dutch Guilders on this.

DJ Paul - Hosanna
Jesus On Speed - Jingle Hell
DJ Gizmo - Ghost Of X-Mass Future
Noise Gate - The Magic Sack
Gate 6 - The Snowman
Scrooge - X-Mass Alone
Underground Dwarfs - True Mean Christmas (Freestyle Incl. With Santa)
The Falcon - Speed Battle
D & F - No Sleep 'Till X-Mass
Bang Crosby - I'm Dreaming
The Triplets - Marry X-Mazz
Silverbells - Ring My Christmas Bells
Sensor - Rudolf The Rednose Ravedeer
Claus S - Family X-Mass
X-Mass Raver - Hallelujah
Scarface - Santawaus

It isn't looking great, does it? Just looking at the tracklist, you know there's going to be some cheese in it. And trust me when I say, there's cheese AND a lot of Christmas glitter sprinkled over all the songs.

But you know me, I love a bit of cheese. And this CD has been with me for many years. I still own it, not physically, but digitally. Threw away all my CDs about 7 years ago, as my cars didn't have a CD player, so what was the point. Burned them all onto a hard drive, and rediscovered this CD a few weeks ago. And we are going into the festive season, so why not give this yet another listen?

It is a bad CD, but oh so funny. I couldn't imagine it being played at a major rave nowadays, like Thunderdome or Masters Of Hardcore. It just wouldn't be right. But for little parties, which are focussed on the festive season, it would work. And it could be a guilty pleasure thing: driving in your car, listening to Hardcore/Gabber Christmas songs.

As this was still the early years of Hardcore, it feels slightly unpolished. Rough and raw. But as niche as it is, I do like it. Especially 'The Magic Sack'. That's a true Christmas banger. Worst one? 'I'm Dreaming'. But they are all as good and as bad as each other. It is difficult to describe it, but it's weird to listen to this one.

It's a funny CD. Fun to have. Not valuable or cherished, but surely entertaining. It's something different, and maybe slightly better than the Thunderdome Christmas CDs. The best of the worst. Couldn't make it up, really!